We have been informed that a group of leading British europhiles, outraged at Prime Minister David Cameron´s behaviour at the recent summit in Brussels, are preparing a secret petition to Angela Merkel.
This is the leaked first version of the text:
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| To Her Imperial Majesty The Ruler of All Europeans and Chancellor of the Germans |
May it please Your Majesty,
We the undersigned venture respectfully to approach Your Majesty as profound sympathisers with the noble and enlightened sentiments to which Your Majesty has given expression in the deliberations in Bruxelles recently. Having read and being deeply moved by the petition of the High Representatives of the Commission Européenne in which they make a solemn appeal to Your Majesty in support of the maintenance of the common currency l´euro, first confirmed by His most gracious and Imperial Majesty Helmut Josef Michael Kohl and subsequently re-affirmed in the most solemn manner by all his illustrious successors; we venture to express the hope that Your Imperial Majesty will take into consideration this petition and prayer of Your Majesty´s most humble British servants.
It would be a matter of great regret to us, as to all other admirers of Your Majesty´s enlightened views if events that transpired during the recent deliberations in Bruxelles should retard the cause of amity among your subjects in various parts of our common Empire.
Bruxelles and London .... December, 2011 A.D.
The Right Honourable the Lord Heseltine, CH, PC
The Right Honourable the Lord Kinnock, PC
The Right Honourable Kenneth Clarke, QC, MP
The Right Honourable Nicholas William Peter Clegg, MP
PS
We understand that a copy of the petition will separately be posted to the viceroy in Palais de l'Élysée
Ha ha - very good.
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